Back to blog
News

The Top 10 First Date Mistakes to Avoid

Alice
Alice
25 Jun 2021
First dates are a strange thing. You’ll feel a range of emotions, including fear, nervousness, and anxiety. In essence, they’re the same feelings you experience when heading off for an interview. However, the first date is the exploration phase. It’s the opportunity to learn about each other. After spending weeks or months winning over the other person and convincing them to agree to a date, you’re going to need to make an impression. It’s taken an excessive amount of time to discover that perfect match, so the pressure’s on to get things right.

Perhaps getting your match on a date was simple. Now the work begins because it’s a time to impress, it’s time to learn, and it’s time to find out what you’re both about. Throughout the first date, you’ll ask questions, answer questions and explore each other in new ways. However, dates can either go swimmingly well, or they can go horribly wrong. When they follow the path of going horribly wrong, there’s very little you can do to get things back on track. The damage is done, the hard work leading up to the date has been undone, and there’s no turning back. Despite this, it doesn’t have to be that way because we’re exploring the first-date mistakes that you should avoid. Whether you’ve met someone through speed dating or through another means, avoid the following mistakes, and you’ll find success.

Don’t Treat it Like an Interview
That initial meeting is daunting. There’s no denying that it’s natural to experience nervousness and anxiety while sweaty palms are certainly something you’ll suffer with! However, remember this isn’t an interview. You’re not the interviewer or the interviewee so take everything in your stride. Remember, asking question after question leads to problems. It places your partner in an awkward position and leaves them feeling awkward. Keep everything light-hearted; the conversation will dictate the direction, yet exploring their hobbies and interests will keep everything alive. When answering questions, remember to behave naturally and answer honestly. Remember, maybe speed dating got you here, but it doesn’t matter. Your first date shouldn’t be super-serious on the contrary to this. Even if that was a situation, you considered exceptionally nerve-wracking, but this first date should feel natural and nothing more.

Don’t Be Too Confident
There’s a fine line between being confident and overconfident. The former is perfect for first dates and meeting singles while speed dating. The latter, however, is a horrendous trait that will simply leave people running for the door. There’s nothing wrong with being confident and believing in yourself. Despite this, people don’t want singles who are arrogant and cocky. Being overconfident can leave you feeling like the cat that got the cream but looking like a complete idiot. It’s not an impressive trait because it’ll leave your partner feeling awkward and out of place.

In contrast, nobody wants someone who has zero confidence. Everyone is different, but suffering from a lack of confidence can cause problems too. If you’re shy and reserved, do everything possible to come out of your shell. Even if you’re feeling shy, act confident because it’ll enable your date to feel at ease!

Avoid Correcting Your Date
Nobody is perfect. Not even you (well, maybe!) Therefore, avoid correcting your date on things they say. Even when they make ludicrous claims or get things wrong, go with the flow. Correcting partners will leave them feeling upset, and it’ll leave you looking like a control freak. After impressing them on your speed dating experience, you’re there to learn about their personality. Don’t throw water on their fire if they’re feeling good yet getting things wrong. You’ll come across as someone who is a know-it-all, and that’s something that will leave your first date hanging on by a thread! Keep everything simple and easy, and enjoy the conversation more than the finer details.

Don’t Pick a Bad Location
The first date involves getting to know each other. You’ll sit and chat openly, ask questions, and flirt the night away. However, this proves impossible when you’ve chosen a venue or location that makes things extremely difficult. You’re not going to want to chat to each other while sitting in the middle of a rock concert or while throwing yourself around a racing track in a go-kart. No, what you’re looking for is a quiet location that’s intimate and laid back. Remember those three minutes you were given while speed dating? You exploited every second because the environment enabled you to, and this first date is no different.

Avoid Staring at Your Phone
Sure, smartphones keep us connected, whether that’s our personal lives or professional lives, but first dates require your undivided attention. Your date wants you in the room both physically and mentally. Giving your attention will ensure your date feels connected and the centre of attention. Looking at your phone or watching that television in the corner will leave you looking like someone who simply doesn’t care. Forget about work or checking your social media channels. This moment is about connecting with your date and exploring each other with zero distractions.

Don’t Be Rude
Rudeness is uncalled for in all walks of life, especially when dating. Being honest, fun, and outgoing regardless of how the date is going is the perfect way to engage with each other. Whether it’s pulling out their chair, allowing them to order first, or simply not responding rudely to something they say, it all helps. First dates should be respectful experiences, even dates that are heading in the wrong direction. Even if the waiter hasn’t offered the best service, don’t drag him across the coals. Be civilised and polite while dealing with problems as this will only work to impress your date.

Keeping your cool, managing your emotions, and being accepting works in your favour. You’ll certainly earn dating points when you avoid being rude, trust us!

Discussing Money
Whether you’re wealthy or not, money shouldn’t be discussed during your date. Talking about your large house or expensive sports car won’t win their heart; it’ll leave them wanting you for all the wrong reasons. Finances are meaningless when dating, especially the first date. Anyone venturing on first dates will learn about the other person from a personality perspective. It’s about working out if you fit like a glove or simply detest each other! Nobody likes bragging or showing off, so avoid chatting about money in the bank or covering the cost of the evening because you can afford it. It’s an unattractive trait and certainly won’t lead to love. Instead, place a focus on learning about them. Focus on chatting about real things that matter, such as hobbies, common interests, and having fun. Money will muddy the dating waters and leave you looking like a desperate fool.

Don’t Let Silence Take Over
Want to impress your date? Looking to hook up and arrange that second date? Forget about those awkward silences. Too often, people act like a bull in a China shop and go crazy for chatting before running out of steam. Sure, nerves make things challenging, but your goal should be to keep things moving along like a well-oiled machine. Awkward silences shouldn’t take over because it’ll leave them feeling as though you’re not compatible. Ask leading questions, think of topics to discuss, and keep things ticking along. There is always plenty to chat about, so take your time and let the moment guide you along. Don’t be afraid of silence; just avoid letting it take over!

Don’t Let Your Opinions Push Them Away
Everyone has opinions; they’re a crucial part of life. However, avoid allowing your opinions to take over your date. Nobody needs to hear about why you believe something is right or wrong. Nobody needs to be force-fed opinions about music or films as though they’re factual. What you believe is your own opinion, so keep it that way. If your date mentions something you dislike, don’t instantly reply with “I hate that” or “I think that band you like is awful,” but instead, explore why they like what they like instead of forcing your opinions on them. By forcing opinions, you’ll come across as controlling and powerful, and that’s never a good thing!

Don’t Use the Wrong Body Language
Your date might not be a fully qualified body language expert, but they’ll instantly notice negative body language. Whether your arms are folded, and defensive or you’re constantly checking out what’s happening around the venue, they’ll notice. This approach will instantly leave your date feeling uncomfortable and awkward. Subtle signs and hints associated with your body language can instantly inform dates that you’re not interested. It’s rude to behave this way, so avoid it like the plague. Ensure you maintain eye contact and keep your body language neutral and open.

Speed dating provides the ideal opportunity to discover a match but getting that first date right requires a unique approach. Several crucial things have to seamlessly blend together to create a successful date. Therefore, the mistakes above are simple to avoid but guarantee that every date will go exceptionally well!

Scroll to top